Over lunch with a fellow motivational speaker, I shared my need for some help (i.e. coaching) developing a strategy for booking myself with professional associations. After all, I’m going for 100 gigs this year and I need about 75 more on the calendar.
I went back to the office to find an email from another speaker friend who said she was going to a weekend intensive to learn how to target professional associations. Did I want to go?
What? To anyone who was paying attention, I had just gotten what I had asked for.
My immediate answer should have been “Hells to the YES!”
But it wasn’t.
I looked at the intensive and immediately made the following excuses…
• I don’t really have the money for this right now (although it has a great price).
• Do I really want to take a whole weekend? Do I want to work one of my weekends when I don’t have the kids. I really could use that down time.
• What if it is not really what I need?
• I wonder if there is something better out there.
I had been given EXACTLY what I had asked for NOT 2 HOURS EARLIER…and I wasn’t acting on it.
SO WHY DO WE MAKE EXCUSES?
Actually, I don’t really care to explore WHY we make excuses. I’d rather have a plan for what to do when they come up. “Why” can get complicated and keep us idle while we try to answer the question. I’d rather ask myself…”Now What?” “So I have excuses that are holding me back, now what can I do about it?”
Some Now What? Tips:
1. Call it what it is. It’s not a plausible idea, it’s an excuse. Now there may be truth in your excuses…i.e. money or time, but those things can almost always be overcome if you put your mind to it.
2. Get to the bottom of what is behind the excuse. My hunch is fear is almost always behind every excuse we make.
3. Do some personal inquiry as to what the fear is about. Money? Success? Seen as less than? Name the fear. HINT: It rarely is what you think it is…such as fear of spending money, or wasting time. Rather, it is usually something a little more hidden and a little more scary to you.
4. Ask for help. Almost every list I make about any kick-“but” tip involves asking for help. Find friends or colleagues who will throw the BS flag on your excuses. (That’ Bull ShiFt Flag…coming soon.)
So, I‘m going to this intensive. I‘m spending the money, I’m taking the time and I’m taking the risk that it might not be what I want it to be. But it could be the game changer I’ve been looking for.
After all, I placed my “order” and it appeared right on cue!