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Archive for Break Out of Old Mindset

Quit Feeding the Worry Monster!

dont worry

“Worry is a misuse of the imagination.” 

~ Dan Zadra


We worry to feel productive.  At the end of the day, if we have wrung our hands, taken a lot of deep and mournful sighs, we go home tired and feeling like we have worked hard.

But we haven’t.  We’ve just spun our wheels, wallowed in our own poop and gotten no closer to tackling the thing that has us worrying in the first place. 

So how do we stop worry?  Here are a few tips for getting off the Worry Wagon!

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Drama . . . It’s Not Just for Teenagers Anymore

Cheri Drama

“Maturity starts where drama ends.”

I live with two teenagers and our house if filled with drama. I tease that when this stage of my life as a parent is over, I will have PDSD (Post Dramatic Stress Disorder). 

But the ugly truth is I bring just as much drama to the table as they do.  Not always out loud because I have learned how to contain or temper my drama so it is more palatable (or at least that is my story . . . and I’m sticking to it.)  But clearly I can be just as dramatic as they can.

But let’s go back to teenagers for a minute. 

Just exactly what is it that teens and tweens do that has adults rolling their eyes? 

They . . . .

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Some Things Have Got To Go!

cheri britton blog 4 march

“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.” 
Ann Landers

There are some things than must go down.  They must DIE.  Your negative stories about your self are those things.  It is time to PULL THE PLUG on your Story!

Like…those shoulder pads or leg warmers or worn out socks.  If you still have some in your drawer, let me be the first to tell you “Let them go already.”   

So it is with our miserable old stories about ourselves.

We hold on to old beliefs like they were our last crumb of bread.  When what we should do is toss them out like that molding container of “who knows what” in the back of the fridge.

Perhaps these ideas or stories were good ideas and served us well at some point (debatable…remember the Leisure Suit…polyester…really?)  but we simply don’t need them anymore.  Keeping them in your mental closet is bringing you down, man.

“But I’ve got plenty of space”, you say.  Bull-Poop!  You can’t afford to give your prime mental real estate to anything that is not serving your highest good!

Don’t think that I don’t know how hard it is to throw out old ideas.  In fact, changing your mind can be one of the hardest things you will do.  But it is worth the effort?

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Disharmony Wastes Time (and can sound pretty bad too)

bad-music-web

But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?

Albert Camus

Disharmony is the lack of agreement.  Imagine a band where everyone is playing a different song all at the same time.  What a mess!  Believe it or not, I’ve sat through some “music” like this and made me wish for some ear plugs and a margarita . . . stat!

Disharmony can sound pretty awful but what does it look like? 

Discord, friction, strife, conflict, hostility, acrimony, bad blood, dissension, feuding, quarreling and more.

In contrast, harmony is when things are in agreement; like a well-rehearsed orchestra.  It sounds delightful and can look even better.  Listening to this kind of music makes you feel joy, exhilaration, or exuberance.  It looks like:

Peacefulness, amity, amicability, friendship, fellowship, cooperation, understanding, consensus, unity, sympathy, rapport, like-mindedness and more.

Ok, which of these do you want in your life?  More importantly, which do you have now?

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How to Recognize if You are Stuck So you Can Get Moving!


Road with Sunset

 

Complaining is not a strategy

On a scale of 1 – 10, how happy are you?  Are you moving?  Is your life what you want it to be or are you stuck, not getting the results you truly want.  Below is a list of signs and symptoms of stuckness – see if you recognize yourself or your team.

  1. Your life feels flat or dull and nothing really excites you.
  2. Your spaces (such as your office, home or specific rooms in your house) feel oppressive or uninviting.
  3. Your language is negative and you use words like “can’t”, “stuck”, “I should” “never” or “always”, etc.
  4. There are items on your to-do list that have been there for a very long time.
  5. You have general aches and pains that can’t be tracked back to anything specific.
  6. You spend a lot of time with your shadow comforts (i.e. TV, food, computer games, gossip, napping, shopping, etc) and you feel ashamed.
  7. You have trouble sleeping or you sleep too much. Read More→

Stay Motivated at Work During the Holidays

photo credit: Chris Devers via photopin cc

photo credit: Chris Devers via photopin cc

Yes, December is still a month in which we have to go to work and produce.  But wow, it can be hard to stay focused with everything that is added to our plates.  It’s likely that thinking about our job and the work that has to get done will be elbowed out of our minds as we begin the downward slide to the end of the year.

But the work still needs to get done, and we are the only ones who can do it.

What are some ways you can stay motivated during the holiday season? Here are a few simple ideas.

  • Stop feeling guilty about taking time off. Americans take fewer vacation days than their professional counter parts in other parts of the world. Many of us stockpile our personal time off only to realize that we can’t possibly use it all. The Holidays are the perfect opportunity to spend some time away from the office. You can go holiday shopping, decorate, or just spend time at home with your family.  
  • Get a head start. Year-end tasks can creep up on us just as we are trying to get out the door to celebrate the holidays with our families. Start NOW looking at all the things that need to be finished by the end of the year or just after the first of January. Create lists to keep track of tasks and start on them right now. Prioritize your personal needs with lists as well so you can make sure you can get everything done without rushing. (PS:  A coach is great help with this one)
  • photo credit: Chris Devers via photopin cc

    photo credit: Chris Devers via photopin cc


    Clean your office. This might sound like an odd suggestion for the end of the year, but it will help you feel more on track and motivated to keep working. We accumulate so much clutter throughout the year and the end of it is the perfect time to ditch everything you won’t need as you move into the holiday season and the year ahead. Business sometimes slows down around the holiday so use this time to unclutter your office.  
  • Throw that office holiday party. Celebration and relaxation are powerful motivators for you and for your staff. Don’t forget to get into the spirit of things and throw a holiday party to show everyone you care about them. Depending on your budget you can have a party at a fancy restaurant, a bar, or even if you own office. If you host the part off-site, give your team the afternoon off to go home, get ready, and head to the location with their spouse or another guest.  If there is drinking involved, provide a designated driver.  You’ll want everyone to be safe!

Stress truly is optional at the holidays . . . I promise.  Take it slowly, one day at a time, and you’ll be able to enjoy the season.

Do you want more ideas for motivating yourself and your staff during the holidays? Contact me, Cheri Britton, for one on one coaching or motivational speaking.

Work/Life Balance: Be Happy

I’m sure you’ve heard someone refer to the concept of “Work/Life Balance.” You may have even used the phrase yourself a time or two.

But what does it really mean?

Often, the way we use it in our culture, it really doesn’t mean anything. The concept is still exceptionally important, no matter how you say it.

60s counterculture personality and writer Paul Krassner was quoted in a 1968 issue of Time Magazine saying, “Some anthropologist said that one definition of happiness is to have as little gap as possible between your work and your play.” 

If any one portion of our lives becomes too out of balance with the others that is when we start to feel stress and panic. That is when we stop being happy and start freaking out just a little.

So how can we (as employees or business owners or busy parents or any number of other definitions) create a better work/life balance for ourselves? There are a few things we can do to change our lives today. They may not always be easy but your happiness and wellbeing is always worth it.

  1. Have a Support System. No man or woman is an island. It is nearly impossible to have your cake and eat it too if it is just you and a fork. You’ll end up with a hell of a stomach ache if you try to do things that way. Allow yourself to rely on your friends and family for support.
  2. Manage Your Time. Last week, I shared some time management hacks that could help you reclaim your day. This is extremely important for not getting overwhelmed or finding yourself working through evenings and weekend just to get things done. Don’t forget to say “No” once in a while. You can’t be all things to all people.  
  3. Nurture Yourself. That day at the spa? It isn’t a luxury, it is a necessity! You need to step away and recharge your batteries. I can’t stress that enough. It is absolutely imperative for the human body to take breaks. Do whatever makes you happiest; go for a hike, head to the bar, or enjoy a movie with friends.
  4. Avoid Negativity. I am not only talking about other people who bring their negativity to the table. I’m also talking to you. Your inner voice who says you can’t do something or that the project is simply impossible. You don’t have to live in a fairy tale world and you can be realistic about things, but negativity is the single biggest soul crusher in your life.

Are you craving a better work/life balance? Do you need some extra help finding ways to bring happiness in your life? You’re in luck! That is what I do best so contact me today!