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Author Archive for Cheri Britton

Smart People Let Their Minds Wander

39265893-daydream

“Live in the moment.”  “Get your head out of the clouds and put your feet on the ground.”  “Just the facts, ma’am.”  “QUIT DAYDREAMING and get to work!”

I have a hard time living in the moment.  I seem to always be reliving the past or fantasizing about the things I want to do/say/be in the future.  But try as I might to sit and meditate and “be here now,” my mind continues to wander. This is a real challenge when there are so many things that I believe need to get done.  So I continue to try and whip myself into shape, get my head out of the clouds and do the work. 

But then, another metaphorical squirrel crosses my path or an idea that is worth chasing appears and I’m off once again, daydreaming about the “what if.” 

Imagine how happy I was when I learned that this mind-wandering or daydreaming that I seem to do so often is now being shown to be a good thing! Read More→

What Are You Avoiding?

avoidance

“Pain in this life is not avoidable, but the pain we create avoiding pain is avoidable” R.D. Laing.

A while back I received a card from a former coach of mine.  She congratulated me on some exciting things that were happening in my business. Her card referred to a time in one of our sessions when she asked me why I thought so many things were falling into place.  It seemed to me it was because I had been willing to do some hard things I’d been avoiding.

I said, “Whenever I do something hard and scary, something BIG always happens.”

There it was . . . my truth . . . right there in black and white staring me in the face. Read More→

Structure Equals Freedom

Ducks

Structure equals freedom! 

Let that one soak in . . . Structure equals Freedom!

Many of us rail against this idea because we fear that structure will become our master, that all spontaneity will be lost and that we will be forced to be a robot-like Stepford wife. 

Yet we know that when we do what has to be done we are HAPPY!  Yes Happy! 

Happiness is the wonderful by-product of doing what needs to be done. 

So, how can we put some structures in place so that they don’t feel . . . well . . . too structured?

I’ve studied this for myself (I’m the queen  of developing structures and systems), so I’ve learned a few tips and had some eye-opening insights that have been very helpful to me and my clients. Read More→

What Will It Take to Satisfy You?

Certificate SEAL

 Are you a perfectionist?  Do you think you must do things 100% perfect all of the time or you shouldn’t even try?  Or . . . are you a person who cuts corners, sweeps the dust under the rug and hopes nobody knows?  Either one of these extremes can cause us to have big buts. 

We either are afraid of doing things imperfectly (so we don’t start or don’t finish them) or we slack off and never seem to get things done because we let ourselves off the hook.

No matter which way you are bent, I offer you one of my favorite terms:  

Condition of Satisfaction

I began coaching with Jennifer Loudon in the year 2000 and she turned me on to this phrase.  Basically, a Condition of Satisfaction is what you need to happen so you will be satisfied.  Pretty simple, huh? 

However, asking yourself to define AHEAD OF TIME what your condition of satisfaction will be can often shine a light on places where you are holding unreasonable expectations or no expectations at all.

Here’s what I mean.

Let’s say you decide you’re going to start a new exercise regime.  You decide you should go to the gym everyday and work out for one hour.  Pretty clear, right?  But let’s face it . . . life happens and pretty soon you miss a day. 

If you are a perfectionist you may decide to postpone this new commitment until your “schedule gets more freed up.”  If you are one who slacks off a bit you may decide a day here and there is better than nothing, so you let yourself off the hook for this new goal. 

By setting a Condition of Satisfaction AHEAD OF TIME and making a realistic but firm commitment, you are more likely to get your “butt” there. 

You could decide your goal is to get to the gym everyday but your Condition of Satisfaction is that you do this at least five days a week.  You’ve lowered the bar a bit but you’ve determined that five days is what you will accept in order to not beat yourself up.  You allow for imperfection to be your new perfect.

Or, put another way, you decide you need to be at the gym five days a week and anything less is not making your health a priority.  In this case, you’ve set a Condition of Satisfaction that requires you to step up and not drop the ball.

So, turning over a new leaf or starting a new project?  What is your Condition of Satisfaction for this new thing you want to do?  Do you want to work on it every day?  An hour a week?  Get one index card completed every weekend?  How do you want to play this?  

What are some reasonable goals that stretch you toward getting this important thing done but also allows for you to be imperfect.  

Cheri is a speaker, trainer, coach and has authored two books.  She helps people and organizations break out of old mindsets so they can lead happy, motivated and fired up lives.  She blogs to ignite you and help you get unstuck!

Take Things from Impossible to Inevitable!

Motivation concept

“I dwell in possibility.”

Emily Dickenson

One of the most inspiring speakers I’ve ever heard (and I’ve seen a lot) was Glenn Morshower.  Glenn is a character actor whose face you would likely recognize but not know his name.  On television (West Wing, 24, etc.) and in movies (Transformers, Xmen, Moneyball) Glenn typically plays serious, hard-assed characters.  Wow, was I shocked when I heard him speak!  He is one of the funniest and most profound speakers I have ever experienced. (and that’s sayin’ a lot because I’ve heard tons of ‘em)

This is one of the best things he shared with us . . . and I share it with you.

Read More→

Quit Feeding the Worry Monster!

dont worry

“Worry is a misuse of the imagination.” 

~ Dan Zadra


We worry to feel productive.  At the end of the day, if we have wrung our hands, taken a lot of deep and mournful sighs, we go home tired and feeling like we have worked hard.

But we haven’t.  We’ve just spun our wheels, wallowed in our own poop and gotten no closer to tackling the thing that has us worrying in the first place. 

So how do we stop worry?  Here are a few tips for getting off the Worry Wagon!

Read More→

What, Lassie? Has Someone Fallen In the Well?

cheri well

“Fear is the glue that keeps you stuck. Faith is the solvent that sets you free.” 
 Shannon L. Alder

 

If you fell into a well what would you do? 

Would you make a list of all the things that need to get done to get out of the well? 

“Let’s see, I need to yell and find someone to help. Then I need to tell them to get a ladder or a rope.  But wait, they need to call my family and tell them where I am.  My family will never think to look in the well.  But why did I fall in here?  Is this a message from God? Is this like a metaphor for what I’m doing in my life?  About how I keep falling into holes and getting off task.  Gosh this is going to make a great blog post.  I wonder what the title should be? “

NO . . . you wouldn’t do this.  You would yell for help.  End of story!  You would do the next right thing . . . Which is to get out of the fickin’ frackin’ well!

We get stuck all the time.  We get stuck when we don’t know how to get more clients.  We get stuck when we can’t get our butts to the gym.  We get stuck when we can’t figure out how to parent our kids when they are driving us crazy.  Then when we’re stuck we often sit and THINK ABOUT HOW TO GET UNSTUCK!

How do I know this?  Because I do this . . . If I’m not paying attention I will make plan to make plan to get unstuck. 

Read More→